fall is almost here guys
This is going to be me in a few years when I finally crack.
I really wish I were normal…for all these years, I took pride in being different…in being smart…but now I realize that I’m just…insane.
I wish I could be normal so bad. I wish I could enjoy normal things. I wish I had a normal female brain. I wish that my goal in life was to have a nice family some day, some kids, a husband who would take care of me while I was a stay at home mom. I wish I wanted a nice big house in a white-fenced neighborhood.
I wish I wanted all that stuff around 30 years old, when I felt it was time to settle down. I wish now in my 20’s, I wanted to be out with my girls, living it up. I wish I wanted to hang out a bars every friday night just to chill out. I wish I wanted to go to that Halloween party, or St. Patrick Day party, and get super drunk to the point where I puke.
I wish I would enjoy a blunt every now and then. I wish I’d get so tipsy at my bff’s 21st birthday party, that I would simply laugh about not remembering who I had sex with last night.
I wish I enjoyed putting together chips and dip’s for my honey’s Superbowl party. I wish I could laugh with his friends as I sipped my corona to enjoy the week’s end.
I wish…I wish so hard this was me. I wish I had been born a different person…I wish I had been born with a different brain. I wish I had never gotten that encephalitis (not fucking herpes) that forever ruined my perception on things.
Then I would be a normal girl. Then things wouldn’t hurt so bad in life. Then I wouldn’t allow people to hurt me so bad in life. Then I wouldn’t still be crying for an ex almost 3/4 months later. Then I would be laughing with my girls who have helped me get through it, saying so cheerfully, “Life sucks, then you die. Fuck it, lets get high!”
Then maybe if I had been a normal girl. If I enjoyed going out every week with my girls. If I had a normal brain that didn’t stress me out over the stupidest shit…if I had been enthused about my honey going to bars and playing pool like normal guys do…if I had just been able to understand that that sort of thing is okay and fine. If I had just accepted his desire to make all the money to take care of me while I stayed at home and cooked…if I had just talked with a smile and felt enthusiastically about giving my mother-in-law grandchildren…then maybe I would still be with him today.
Maybe he wouldn’t have ran out on me. We would probably still be together, smiling and laughing as we drank a beer and played some Halo. We would still have a future together.
You know that saying, right? That line that is usually plastered over a shirt that some stupid hipster bitch is wearing, who probably doesn’t even know the difference between Star Trek and Star Wars.
THIS is what the shirt really means. It’s not going up to someone and saying, “Hey what’s your favorite Sherlock episode?”
Now…this is what it is.
”QUIT wanting that asshole back. He sucks, Patricia. He’s more fail than a Pikachu without electric attacks. He’s more useless than a Ledgendary Poke’Mon who can only Tackle & Growl. He makes Magikarp look like the best decision against Mewtwo.”
Or another example, “You’re Dean, and I’m your Cass…and I just need to pull you out of Hell sometimes.”