Why is Kuroshitsuji suddenly becoming a thing everywhere? Wasn’t it back in 2008? Are they playing it on TV or something? ¬_¬
mfw my mom told me that my sister is finally pregnant.
Maybe there was….I don’t know, a reason why she couldn’t get pregnant for over a year now? That is, if you believe in any sort of fate, karma, or whateverenergy.
Her and her husband can’t even control or take care of their pets! I still feel forever sick that my mom and I had to LITERALLY go kidnap her one dog a few years ago, because she
was trying to kill itstopped caring about it since she decided she didn’t want the dog anymore since the dog got old.
Or how about the time she decided she wanted a pit bull, but they shelter TOLD her numerous times that the dog cannot be in a house with cats.
Yet she kept harassing the shelter and skewing things until she could have the dog.
Well guess fucking what- the dog got ahold of one of her cats and ended up biting it’s arm off, so now the cat is missing a leg, and they had to take the dog away. NO SHIT! They fucking told you!
God, there are so many more incidents too.
I have NOT spoken to my sister since 2 years now, because I finally got tired of her bullshit and the type of person she is.
However, my mom still finds it necessary to update me on all the “wonderful things” in my sister’s life.
So for those who know me, I have no tolerance of babies/kids. I don’t like them.
So besides the more pressing matter of “you should not be breeding”, I get to spend the next years of my life hearing about nothing but “thebabythebabythebaby”….and further looked down upon for me not having a normal life now.
My mom is so excited to have a grandchild…well mom, you’re not going to have a grandchild, you’re going to have A child since I’m giving it a month’s top before my sister either screws up with her spawn, or decides she doesn’t want it.
Okay…okay…must continue to focus on good stuff….
I kind of miss browsing tumblr…I’ve just been so afraid of being triggered by something…mostly it’s TF2/Scout things…but I miss my dash, I miss interacting with the people on my dash…I miss TF2, I miss enjoying Scout, I just hate that my ex looks like him, so I’m having a hard time detaching the two…maybe the answer is to not avoid it, but to just remember what I liked about the character before I met that
Uuuhg…what to do?
I’m….getting so many new followers lately. I don’t understand with the sort of things I post anymore… Do people really like to read depressing things? Maybe they want to find other people they can relate to, if they are having darkness themselves? Or maybe they are just people who simply find my pathetic wallowing humorous.
No…I just have to keep reminding myself to be mindless, to not HAVE to seek answers for every little thing, and to down that schnapps next to my bed.
I love that the liquor store is one of the only things that is within walking distance of my place. ♥
I really wish I were normal…for all these years, I took pride in being different…in being smart…but now I realize that I’m just…insane.
I wish I could be normal so bad. I wish I could enjoy normal things. I wish I had a normal female brain. I wish that my goal in life was to have a nice family some day, some kids, a husband who would take care of me while I was a stay at home mom. I wish I wanted a nice big house in a white-fenced neighborhood.
I wish I wanted all that stuff around 30 years old, when I felt it was time to settle down. I wish now in my 20’s, I wanted to be out with my girls, living it up. I wish I wanted to hang out a bars every friday night just to chill out. I wish I wanted to go to that Halloween party, or St. Patrick Day party, and get super drunk to the point where I puke.
I wish I would enjoy a blunt every now and then. I wish I’d get so tipsy at my bff’s 21st birthday party, that I would simply laugh about not remembering who I had sex with last night.
I wish I enjoyed putting together chips and dip’s for my honey’s Superbowl party. I wish I could laugh with his friends as I sipped my corona to enjoy the week’s end.
I wish…I wish so hard this was me. I wish I had been born a different person…I wish I had been born with a different brain. I wish I had never gotten that encephalitis (not fucking herpes) that forever ruined my perception on things.
Then I would be a normal girl. Then things wouldn’t hurt so bad in life. Then I wouldn’t allow people to hurt me so bad in life. Then I wouldn’t still be crying for an ex almost 3/4 months later. Then I would be laughing with my girls who have helped me get through it, saying so cheerfully, “Life sucks, then you die. Fuck it, lets get high!”
Then maybe if I had been a normal girl. If I enjoyed going out every week with my girls. If I had a normal brain that didn’t stress me out over the stupidest shit…if I had been enthused about my honey going to bars and playing pool like normal guys do…if I had just been able to understand that that sort of thing is okay and fine. If I had just accepted his desire to make all the money to take care of me while I stayed at home and cooked…if I had just talked with a smile and felt enthusiastically about giving my mother-in-law grandchildren…then maybe I would still be with him today.
Maybe he wouldn’t have ran out on me. We would probably still be together, smiling and laughing as we drank a beer and played some Halo. We would still have a future together.